By Janet Perez Eckles:
Finding Comfort in Grief After My Son Died
We stood by my front door. “He’s in a better place,” my friend whispered in my ear as she hugged me. The scent of her perfume was a drastic contrast to the stale smell of my heartache after my teen son died.
After the funeral, friends and family went home. They went on with their routines, their plans and life’s joys. I sat on the couch with anguish sitting beside me. Some casserole dishes sat on the kitchen counter and plates covered with aluminum foil were stacked in the fridge. “So you don’t have to worry about cooking,” friends had said.
Cooking? Who wants to eat? Who wants to go on with life? Not me. All I wanted was the nightmare to end. I lost my son Joe at age 19 so tragically–he was stabbed 23 times. It was so sudden and so unfair.
How does one go on with the kind of pain that has no healing? When the emptiness is so deep that nothing or no one can fill it?
Those questions dripped like rain into the dark hole in my heart. But as days and sleepless nights dragged on, I fought to keep going. Until one day I heard a preacher say, “We’re in this world to face trials, but also to hope for healing.”
Did part of me not want to heal? Perhaps, and maybe I needed to change that. I resolved to put an end to the hopelessness. I chose to reach the end of the “poor-me” chant that sounded inside me. I wanted to end the constant gloom.
And when I did, the beginning came, the start of a change. I directed my eyes to Christ. I looked to His comfort and snuggled my soul beside Him to hear His whisper that I would be okay.
It was a beautiful moment when I reached the end—of hopelessness, of self-pity and sorrow.
Then a new beginning came shining with renewed hope and a desire to live, to laugh and to keep believing that each day would be better.
All would improve, not because of the changed situation, but because my sorrow was now in God’s hands. He would complete in me, what was left undone, unhealed and untouched. My soul echoed, “Be confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will be faithful to complete it.” (Philippians 1:6)
As I tossed ingredients for a salad, I placed fresh thoughts of God’s complete healing in my heart. And I added the flavor of His faithfulness that continues to bring a new delight to my soul.
Although blind, Janet Perez Eckles inspires thousands to overcome obstacles, igniting a passion to reach triumph and success. A #1 best-selling author and international speaker, Janet brings inspiration to you at: www.janetperezeckles.com You can find Janet’s story about losing her sight, posted at our suicide prevention website, Thinking About Suicide: Depressed and Blind: Why Go On Living
Read more about how Janet coped with the loss of her teen son who was killed so violently, in her article Forgiveness Brings Peace, at Christian Record Services for the Blind.
See Janet Perez Eckles, originally from Bolivia, in this TV interview describing her hardships and how she overcame them.
From about 5:00 to 17:00 in the video is Janet’s testimony. Do you know she also became blind, and nearly lost her husband as well? Yet her life was changed, with God’s help.
Also see Janet Perez’ testimony, in Spanish: Te invito a escuchar una porción de mi testimonio. We hope you will share this link with your Spanish-speaking friends: janetperezeckles.com/welcome/mi-historia/